Peter Emmerson

Grieving is terrible, terrible.  It is especially difficult for those with no god or any other idealistic palliative political dogma given substance and guarantee by priests, philosophers and mathematicians.  Dead people are dead; those who have gone are gone.  It is those left behind who grieve in lonely exile till they die too.  And yet we are so willing to let go of those we love for reasons other than self-defence.  We are so obsessed with optimism that we fail to appreciate feelings of melancholy and loss associated with change until we stumble into their consequences when it is too late.  And when they are lost, and grieving takes their place, we have so little to help, if for you, as with me, god is dead and political dogma properly tarnished.  Only Nietzsche’s words have offered me guidance and some solace: he is not right, for he was a philosopher.  But as a philosopher who debunked philosophers, he is worth listening to.  I believe that by grieving we are living as we should.  We should not deny it, but drink it in full measure as we would any other of our most significant experiences.  After such grieving, uncorrupted by supernatural and political beliefs, we may be far more resistant to so easily letting go those we love.  Why did nobody tell me this all those years ago when I really needed it, when I was young?  Because they were too busy ‘getting by’ to deal properly with grieving; too reliant on ready-made tools for grieving supplied to political zealots by priests, philosophers and mathematicians.  Only those like I am now, with autonomy enough, have time to think and time to grieve.  If this helps anyone I am pleased.